If we care than we will show it...

I would just like to say that the purpose of me putting out this blog is in the hopes that the readers will take a look at themselves and try to make themselves more available to others who might be going through some of these things.  This particular blog is not directed towards anyone, and I am the first to admit that I myself have failed in the area that this blog addresses.  It is my sincere hope that the people reading this who claim that they are Christians will not feel bad or even angry, but it is my hope that they will read this and become even more open to listening and helping others.  Once again, I am not calling anyone out or trying to anger anyone, I am saying my own faults in this matter.

By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.

I have recently attended a Christmas party with a group of friends and towards the end of the party a wonderful individual (who has been going through an extremely difficult time this year due to marital issues) was asked how she has been doing right as she was about to leave.  The wonderful person blew up and vented saying that she is finding out who her true friends are because the ones that have known she has been going through these things have not called or tried to find out how she has been doing and she was obviously very hurt.  The sad part is that the normal Christian approach to someone being in pain is to:

a. leave the person alone, 

b. stay away from them, 

c. take a hands off approach, 

d. shun them, 

e. act as if they have done something wrong (even when they haven't), 

f. think that they deserve what they are going through , 

g. or even to just drop them from your friend list(I'm not talking MySpace, I'm talking acting as if they are no longer a friend).  

As Christians we say :

a. I'll pray for you (I am not against this,I support this, but surely we can do more for a person than remember them when talking to God.  How about we pray for them AND do something else).

b. Call me (This is the most common line that I hear.  As Christians or even as decent human beings, we should take the initiative to reach out to someone we know is in pain.  Think about it, when would someone in pain finally call?  When they feel they can't take it anymore.  If you don't matter to a person enough to call them, than why should they call you?).

c.  Let me know if there is anything I can do (People are not normally going to ask for something, so how about YOU/WE keep calling that person and SEE if there is anything that can be done.  Being available is sometimes the best thing a friend can do.)

With mush shame, I must admit that I myself am one of the people who has failed this wonderful person.  I have talked to her (when I have seen her) and I have called (2 or 3 times over the year and all of that was before/during the summer), but besides that, I myself have not reached out to "minister" to another person who claims they are a Christian when in reality I should have.  Not only have I not ministered to this wonderful person, I have not even been a very good friend to her.  As a Christian I have failed.  

Sure I have had "reasons" not to reach out.  I myself have had issues over the year, but that is no excuse to not even being a good friend to another person who was in need. The fact is that I should have been much more proactive than I have been.  The trap that "church people" or even true Christians fall into is that we become Fair weather Friends.  We are only there for each other as long as things are going great for you but if you have something that could bring us down/make us think less of you (such as a dissolving marriage, loss of a job, financial problems - all of which we coincidentally use to judge someone as a success) than we will not be there for you.  True Christians (myself included) need to make more time for others.  

As this is the Christmas season, why not reach out to someone in pain (and statistics show that everyone knows someone in pain) and earn the title of being called a friend.

I once had a class in bible college in which the professor continuously stated that we should always be available for those who need us.  How can we be a minister if we are not ministering?

The place where your hearts most authentic desire calls you is the place where your deep gladness and the world's deep hunger meet.

If every one's feeling it, but no one is seeing it, than how are they supposed to know it's real?

As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace.  1st Peter 4:10